Shine – Take That
You, you’re such a big star to me
You’re everything I wanna be
But you’re stuck in a hole and I want you to get out
I don’t know what there is to see
But I know it’s time for you to leave
We’re all just pushing along
Trying to figure it out, out, out, oh your anticipation pulls you down, when you can have it all
My favourite memory of Becky was of her practising majorettes in our front room to Abba’s Dancing Queen, when she must have been around 7 years old. The image of her practicing her steps became the opening scene of my first play Drive Away The Darkness, a play named without irony from a Rolf Harris song Sun Arise. I had reached 29 years old and panicked – I hadn’t written a play yet ! So sat down and vomited up the family history based around an Easter weekend from hell. It was, to all intents and purposes, my family’s version of Eugene O’Neill’s A Long Day’s Journey Into Night. The finished play got a rehearsed reading at the National Theatre Studio in London under the wing of Peter Gill in 1986 and… that was pretty much that. Gill and Nicholas Wright summoned me into a room after the reading was done and asked me “what I wanted to do with it?” “Get it produced?” I answered. They smiled condescendingly “no, we meant what do you want to do with the material?” I didn’t know what they were talking about. “Go away and have a think about it”. No clues, no notes, no help was offered. I wondered what the point of it all was. Encouragement ?
Legendary photo from late 1972
My sister Rebecca was born on April 29th 1972 when I was a teenage boy of 15. Mum was in and out of Amberstone Hospital at this point, as usual, and Becky’s dad, John Daignault (see My Pop Life #132) had been ejected from our council house in Newton Park by the police for domestic violence when Mum was 9 months pregnant. So Becky was born into a recently peaceful, if shaky household. And although the hospital visits continued (about 2 weeks at a time when Mum couldn’t cope) somehow the social workers managed to keep Becky – and us three boys – out of care. Various people helped out, notably a girlfriend of Paul’s called Sharon, who must’ve been around 13 herself. A few years later I was gone, to Lewes, thence to London, University and the rest of my life. But I’ve always had a close relationship with Bex despite the age difference.
Becky and Sparky, 1979 ?
We lived on the edge of a large council estate, our garden backed onto a vast Sussex field which led to Marshfoot Lane and Herstmonceux Observatory eventually, although none of us ever went that far. I’d come back for Easter, for Christmas and birthdays etc, usually for a punch-up (not literally!) with Mum, and a chat with Becky about how things were going. By now Mum had met Alan, perhaps through Gingerbread, an organisation for single parents, and they had married. Alan was a decent bloke and treated Rebecca as if she was his own daughter, bless him, and still does to this day. She went to the same school as Andrew and Paul in Hailsham, before Mum decided to move in with Alan in Polegate. By now Rebecca had met Peter and they were married with much fanfare and dancing on July 4th 1992, some three weeks before my wedding to Jenny. It meant Becky couldn’t be a bridesmaid because the fittings were during her honeymoon…it also meant that I wasn’t there. Becky remembers this as filming Alien 3 which was a year earlier – but I did have to fly to Los Angeles to shoot some extra bits so perhaps that was it – anyway – Paul and Andrew were there in spades…
Paul, Rebecca, Andrew July 4th 1992, Eastbourne
Rebecca marries Peter July 4th 1992
Bex, Darren, Peter, me, Mum, Debs (behind Mum), Paul, Alan
Us kids had, for many many years, only one topic of conversation when we hooked up – Mother. It drove our various partners mad knowing that we would huddle together in a coping quartet – Ralph, Paul, Andrew Becky – and relate the latest installment of the soap opera of our family. Thankfully those days and that feeling of perma-crisis have gone. We’ve grown. But I think Mum’s personality and issues were so powerful that it bound us together. Becky has always been my sister, never my step-sister. Becky and Peter got divorced, and she married John Coleman from Dagenham in 1997. I offered my blue Jaguar as her wedding car and left Brighton too late, bombing up the M23 at 120mph. Got a ticket too and appeared at Haywards Heath magistrates a few months later and got a £200 fine and was banned for six months. “But it was my sister’s wedding” I said. Becky and John had three lovely kids – Mollie, Ellie and William (see My Pop Life #120).
Renewal of vowels 2005- Ellie, sleeping Will, John, Bex and Mollie
In 2005, eight years after the marriage and now in Strood on the Medway, they renewed their vows. It was a lovely day. I was doing Nighty Night at the time in Bude in Cornwall. We joked that they’d renewed their vowels – an E and an O.
Soon after that they moved down to Sussex and an old house in Horsebridge near Hailsham. Closer to Mum and to us, we saw more of each other. But the marriage was broken and John moved back to East London.
Becky marries Steve, 2013
In 2013 Becky married Steve in Eastbourne, Paul came back from China to be there, it lasted about a year and a bit. Becky is now single and living in Hailsham, near Mum, with Ellie and William still at school.
So that’s the bare bones of a life that tell you nothing about the woman. She is, as the song suggests, resilient and optimistic, tough and glamourous, funny and generous. Becky is the best mimic of our mother of all of us, and when she relates the latest installment of our mum, we are weeping with laughter. She has re-trained herself so many times as a businesswoman, nail technician, health consultant while ferrying the kids to schools in Ringmer, Hamden Park, Hailsham and Eastbourne and William to football practice while swimming three times a week and doing the family shopping looking after a dog and popping in to clean Mum’s house and do some shopping for her that really she ought to look like a wet dishrag of exhausted martyrdom. But Becky has it seems, unlimited powers and juice – like the duracell bunny – powers of determination and a centred strength of being that brooks no fools, and suffers no half-stepping. I’m very proud of her, and I was very proud to play at her 40th birthday (previously discussed in My Pop Life #120 from a different angle) and more especially to play this particular song.
A young Take That in 1990
Tune. First things first. It’s a tune. A major key piano bounce with vocal harmonies will almost always find favour with me, an echo of English pop, particularly Penny Lane (see My Pop Life #36) & Mr Blue Sky. This though from 2007 and the most successful boy-band of all time, and one who actually wrote their own material. Built around songwriter Gary Barlow in 1990, the original members were a bank clerk (Mark Owen) a hopeful breakdancer (Jason Orange) a carshop paintsprayer (Howard Donald) and a 16-year-old teenager (Robbie Williams) all of whom auditioned a number of times for Nigel Martin-Smith in Manchester before securing the gig. One of the most successful and loved bands in British Pop History, they swept all before them during the 1990s with some beautiful songs – A Million Love Songs, Back For Good, How Deep Is Your Love – until William’s drug issues forced him out in 1995 and Take That disbanded the following year to the sound of a million broken teenage hearts. In fact the UK government set up suicide hotlines because so many teenage girls were distraught.
The 4-piece without Williams eventually got back together in 2005, toured in 2006, then dropped this great single Shine with a lead vocal by Mark Owen, a love letter to the missing Williams, in early 2007. It won the Ivor Novello in 2008 for best song, and sure enough Robbie Williams rejoined Take That in 2010 for a reunion tour and album, but the band currently exist as a 3-piece in the wake of Jason and Robbie’s subsequent departures.
Bex has been obsessed with Take That since their inception in 1990, and has seen them at least six times live, in all their various incarnations. On the occasion of her 40th birthday, her step-dad Alan hired my band The Brighton Beach Boys to play the birthday party, and we learned Shine especially for the event. Or did we ? Actually I think I decided on the morning of the gig that I would play it for her, alone if necessary, and when I told the band in the soundcheck they joined in. I had printed a few copies of the charts in case we had time, and we did. I’ve just found the setlist from that show :
We may be a Beach Boys tribute band but we have a few party tunes up our collective sleeve too, thanks to the excellence of Mr Stephen Wrigley, Mr Glen Richardson, Mr Theseus Gerrard, Mr Adrian Marshall, Ms Charlotte Glasson and – in those days – Mr Rory Cameron. The ska section had just been played at our 1969 Show, and Dancing Queen & Night Fever had been played at Caroline Lucas’50th Birthday bash. The ever-expanding playlist strikes again. But Shine was a one-off, just for Becky.
I don’t think we got the Stop! bit right, although a few people attempted it. The thing is with a Stop! bit is that unless everyone does it, it isn’t a Stop! bit at all. At all at all. But it went down well, and is a thrillingly good song to play live. Uplifting. The link to Mr Blue Sky became apparent when Take That played it live and started the song with the end of Jeff Lynne’s great pop song. Unfortunately I wasn’t aware of that in 2012.
Ellie, William, Rebecca, Mollie
I’ve always loved my sister unconditionally. She is the strongest of us all, the closest to Mum and the most volatile of all four kids – her relationship with Heather, my mother, is tempestuous to say the least. I listen to them both bitching in extremis about the other and just nod, like Alan, like my Dad, like Johnny Coleman – yes dear.
I’m not stupid enough to take sides with the women in my family, they’re too fierce.
Don’t you let your demons pull you down
Cos you can have it all, you can have it all, all, ALL
So c’mon oh c’mon get it on I dunno what you’re waiting for your time is coming don’t be late
So c’mon, see the light on your face, let it shine, let it shine
the full live version from the Circus tour 2009. Rebecca was there !